Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
