i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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