So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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