New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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