Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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