I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
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