i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
