just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Oh god it's open bar.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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