I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
