You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
