I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I smell stomach acid.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
