I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
