I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize