If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
