In the future we'll all be gay
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
