Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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