I just pynch a tree in the face
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I think your dad took our porno
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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