just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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