I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize