Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
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