angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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