she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
i think i just lost a toe
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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