suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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