Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
