Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
