Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
