I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
it hurts more in the daytime
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
