I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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