This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
She's not a foreskin expert like you
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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