What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize