Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
