plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize