people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I'm at about main and main street
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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