I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
You may now shotgun with the bride
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
