We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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