oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize