I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
