when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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