You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
