Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I don't deserve a penis
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
