none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
