I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
This is classic penis vs brain.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
