My nipple is on Facebook.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Im just a social blackout drinker.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
