Whod you bang
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
