im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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