Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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