Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
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