Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize