Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
