cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Less talking, more tequila
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
