did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
